Friday, May 27, 2011

Ch-Ch-Ch-Changes

     I was going to make a comment here based on the lyrics of the David Bowie song, but it seems that there are several interpretations of what the lyrics actually are.  So scrap that plan. 

     You know, I read a biography of David Bowie when I was a teenager... I wasn't a big fan or anything, I would just go to the library and occasionally pick a random biography to read.  People at depth have always interested me.  This interest led to my reading about the previously mentioned David Bowie, Janis Joplin, Calvin Klein, Harvey Milk, Vincent Van Gogh, and several other people who were apparently unmemorable to me.  I also read several books on massage techniques, indoor and outdoor gardening, and international cooking as a teen.  I didn't really have anything better to do, it would seem.

     Anyway, there are some changes coming up for my newly-formed V.  We're moving in together.  We found a house to rent which will provide the things that we will need, along with a nice yard and beach access.  We're excited.  I'm sure that issues will arise as we figure out how to navigate this thing called a relationship, but I'm also confident that we will find ways to make things work and be happy.  I may have read more, and this may be what I've striven for over the past *checks watch* 15 years or so, but the guys are the ones who are good at this whole poly thing.  I consider myself very fortunate.

     One of the things that has always appealed to me about polyamory is the shared burden aspect.  The more contributing adults you get together, the lighter everyone's load is.  And although I wish we had more time to normalize before moving in together, this is the biggest reason we can't wait.  Separately, we have barely been holding on financially; together we will make a good team.  I love it.  And I love my menfolk for going on this adventure with me.

Tuesday, May 17, 2011

Why Falling In Love With Your Best Friend Is Awesome

     I've been having an interesting time lately; my relationship with my best friend has taken a decidedly not-platonic turn.  The feelings caught us by surprise, but looking back... it's not really that surprising.  We've always gotten along well, we have a ton of quirks and things in common, and we knew each other to an extent that many people never know their supposed significant others.  We practiced speaking four out of five of the Love Languages for some time; and recently added Physical Touch into the mix.  Who knew foot rubs were actually so dangerous? I mean, other than Pulp Fiction.

     I have to admit, feeling so giddy with someone while being this age and comfortable with myself and our transforming relationship is way cool.  So what I suppose I really mean is why me falling in love with my best friend in our particular situation is awesome, but you probably already knew that.  It's so awesome that I even made a list of some reasons.

-No worries about when to say "I love you;" it's already been said.
-Instant history: we already have shared experiences to build upon.
-Knowing that after the "in love" goes away, we will still have a sold relationship, no matter the form it takes.
-No surprise character flaws; we've known about them for the years we've known each other.
-We already know what it's like to be around each other for days and weeks at a time.
-No uncomfortable "getting to know each other" phase, only the wonder of new discoveries in a new context.
-I don't have to explain polyamory or bring up my husband; they know each other, they get along, and my ideas have been the subject of conversation several times.

     We're still figuring things out, and who knows where this path will lead? What I do know is that this new form of an old relationship is currently giving us much happiness, and I'm content with that.